I am a scientist..?

Assalamualaikum..

Good day!

I am just wondering about the fact that I am now in the process of being a scientist. I'm doing a research. I'm doing cancer research. I'm working on the treatment of leukemia since leukemia is one of the common cancer in Malaysia, my beloved country. Leukemia has high incidence especially among children. Acute lymphocytic leukemia is the most common leukemia among Malaysian children. It happens rapidly and require immediate treatment. It will cause accumulation of non-functional blood cells in the blood circulatory system. Low count of normal white blood cells can cause weak immunity in a person's body. Low platelets count can lead to easy bleeding and bruising to the patient. 

So, I'm doing the gene expression analysis on leukemia patients to find out the genes that are responsible in causing leukemia. Once the genes are identified, it will be targeted to be treated so that it won't cause leukemia. I will find the 'bad' genes in leukemia and 'kill' it off.

In order to achieve this objective, I have to understand the causes of leukemia. I have to learn and to investigate the molecular pathway that involve in leukemia which is caused by the gene expression.

However, I'm worried because it is not an easy task. There are so many genes in human body and every individual expresses genes differently to each other.  But, it has been already found out that leukemic cells expressed genes uniquely compared to the normal cells and to other cancer cells. That's a relief for me. So, I really hope that I will be able to find that 'bad' genes in these 2 years of my Master study. 

I have no experience in the method of this study which is by using microarray analysis. So far, I know the principle, but I'm still quite confuse with the data analysis. How am I going to interpret the data? Seriously, there are so many things to study. Hopefully, I will always be keen to study about this topic because it is very interesting. It is just a matter of time to get the understanding and the hidden knowledge about this research. Of course I have to be patient and focus on my study. 

One more thing that is lingering in my mind is, now I'm a grown up. Apart of being a student, I also have other responsibility and that is for my family. Before this, I was also a student, but I'm younger, I am the child. But, in the future, I'm gonna have my own children. I will have a husband. Not to forget, my parents. I think that it is very challenging. But, that's life. Everybody at my age will face the same, whether they pursue their study or their career. Our responsibility becomes bigger. So do the challenges. 

I pray that I will be able to do my best, to give my best to everyone and everything around me. I want a happy family, as well as a successful thesis. I want to be a successful scientist! 
InsyaAllah.... 

A successful scientist.... InsyaAllah
This pic is taken 4 years back if I'm not mistaken.
Alhamdulilah, I'm still here... =)

  

Jom buat Master!!

Assalamualaikum dan salam sejahtera!

Selamat pagi!

Alhamdulilah, syukur ke hadrat Ilahi kita masih bernyawa dan berpijak di atas muka bumi ini lagi. 

Sebenarnya, hari ini Anis nak update perkembangan diri Anis (seperti biasa), sebagai seorang pelajar Master. Kalau sebelum ini, Anis banyak ceritakan tentang FYP, lectures, kehidupan sebagai student Degree, tapi selepas ini lainlah sikit. Anis sudah menjadi lebih berusia, lebih matang dan harap-harap lebih berpengetahuanlah... Amin..

Tujuan Anis share pengalaman-pengalaman Anis ini sebenarnya bertujuan untuk memberi maklumat kepada sesiapa sahaja tentang kehidupan sebagai pelajar dan pengajian dalam bidang Biomedical Science terutamanya di UIA. Anis berharap secara tidak langsung Anis dapat membantu sesiapa yang ingin mencari maklumat untuk melanjutkan pelajaran di UIA dalam bidang yang sama. Selain itu, mungkin ada rakan-rakan Anis yang ingin mengetahui perkembangan diri Anis, jadi Anis coretkan di blog ini, untuk tatapan rakan-rakan dan ahli keluarga. Blog ini juga menjadi seperti sebuah diari bagi Anis yang Anis boleh baca di masa hadapan apabila Anis semakin menginjak usia untuk mengimbau kenangan di zaman-zaman muda remaja. Diari Anis ini juga akan menjadi tatapan anak-anak Anis nanti apabila mereka sudah pandai membaca, sebagai pedoman mungkin.  

Okay, kembali kepada topik utama. Hari ini genap sebulan selepas entry yang sebelum ini dan sudah 6 hari Anis berada di UIA Kuantan sebagai pelajar postgraduate UIA. Hari pertama Anis di sini, Anis hanya dapat berjumpa dengan supervisor Anis iaitu Dr Suhana pada jam 1345 disebabkan beliau menghadiri sebuah bengkel kemahiran sains. Secara normal, hari pertama adalah hari yang 'kosong'. Anis tidak tahu apa yang perlu dilakukan dan masih 'blur'. Hasil perbincangan dengan Dr Suhana, pemahaman Anis tentang apa yang Anis bakal lakukan sepanjang 2 tahun pengajian Anis hanya lebih kurang 5-10%. Kenapa sedikit sangat? Sebab Anis hanya faham tujuan research atau kajian ini, dan Anis dapati sudah ada sedikit perubahan daripada hasil perbincangan sebelum ini. Jadi, Anis tahu banyak yang perlu Anis study, fahami dan dalami sebelum Anis betul-betul faham apa sebenarnya yang bakal Anis lakukan. 

Untuk sesiapa yang tidak tahu apa sebenarnya 'Master by research only' ni, ia adalah program pengajian untuk student yang sudah graduasi (Degree), dan ingin mendapatkan sijil Master dengan membuat kajian/research. No more lectures, assignments and examinations. Only do research and research and research. Jadi, untuk buat research, paling utama adalah kita mesti faham apa tujuan research kita, dengan memahami tajuk research terlebih dahulu. Dan basically, itulah yang Anis cuba lakukan pada minggu yang pertama ini. To understand what is our research about. 

Apabila kita dah faham apa tajuk research kita, apa maksud setiap keyword dalam research title kita, barulah kita boleh fikirkan apa methodology (kaedah eksperimen) yang kita ingin gunakan. So, inilah part yang lebih mencabar sebenarnya. To design our own research. 

Sebagai pelajar Master, sebenarnya kita mengamalkan self-study and independence-study. Kita hanya merujuk kepada sumber-sumber seperti websites, online journals, articles and so on untuk mengumpul maklumat dan seterusnya mensintesiskan maklumat di dalam rujukan-rujukan tersebut. Hanya ulat buku atau nerdy sahaja yang mampu melakukan pekerjaaan ini. Harap maklum. Kalau tak minat, jangan cuba! Kemudian, sekiranya kita ada kemusykilan dan kekeliruan, barulah kita pergi berjumpa dengan mereka yang pakar untuk berbincang dan belajar dengan mereka. So, this is how we do 'Master by research'. Dan goal kita, adalah thesis. At the end of the day, kita perlu menulis sebuah thesis yang mempersembahkan hasil kajian kita. Dan bukan tulis sahaja ya adik-adik, kita juga perlu membentangkan thesis kita kepada examiners yang sangat-sangat berilmu dan berpengetahuan luas. To disseminate (communicate) our research outcomes. 

Jadi, di sini Anis dah gariskan 3 steps utama dalam membuat 'Master by research only' ini:

1. To understand what is our research about.
2. To design our own research.
3. To disseminate our research outcomes.

So, Anis masih di takuk yang pertama yang sebenarnya. So, mungkin dalam masa 2 bulan ini Anis hanya akan fokus kepada step yang pertama. Anis perlu menyediakan sebuah proposal untuk menandakan yang Anis faham apa yang akan Anis lakukan. Proposal tersebut perlu dihantar ke pihak Kulliyyah (fakulti) pada akhir bulan 3 nanti. InsyaaAllah, Anis bimbang tidak sempat tetapi Anis akan cuba lakukan yang terbaik. Anis akan update bila-bila ada masa terluang atau Anis akan curi masa kerana Anis suka berkongsi perkara yang baik untuk tatapan semua. InsyaaAllah... 

Doakan Anis berjaya dan mampu mengharungi kehidupan yang lebih dewasa ini, amin.... =)

My L.I.F.E

Assalamualaikum...

~Wake me up when September ends~

Today is the last day of September again. Yesterday, I was 'awakened' by my beloved Abah. Thank you so much, Abah! I know, my life would be so meaningless and useless without your support. Alhamdulilah, this year I'm 23. Still fresh, young and wild. *peace*

Abah reminds me about L.I.F.E...

This year, I am a final year student, graduating from IIUM Kuantan Campus. Bachelor of Biomedical Science in Environmental Health concentration.

Next year, I will be graduated....so, what's next?

~Live life to the fullest!~

I also wonder what is actually my ambition?

What do I want to do in my life?

Actually, my mission is quite simple. I just want to be happy. I want to feel good. I want to be a good woman.

Let me share my story, a short story about my life, a history.

I was born in 1989. I am the first daughter, the sweetheart of my parents. I grew up with much and lots of love from my father and mother. I am so happy and grateful.

Then, in 1995, I started to go to school. Alhamdulilah, I did well in my early education. I was a smart little girl. I got high marks in exams and became among the best students in my school. The memories that I cannot forget during my primary school:

• Became a member of Tunas Puteri (very proud to be one)
• Went for educational visits to Petrosains and Pusat Sains Negara in Kuala Lumpur and Melaka (it was very exciting!)
• Went for Tunas Puteri camping in Kuantan (challenging but interesting)
• Went for Kem Pintar in Kuantan (i still remember the theme song ~kami anak yg pintar~ - had opportunity to ride on a 'kereta kebal' and helicopters for the first time)
• Acted as a fairy in Talent Competition in Kuala Lumpur representing Pahang (really fun!!) 
• Acted as Tengku Ampuan Afzan in Wacana Diraja representing my school, SKTL (i was quite shy but i got talent)
• Joined Choral Speaking team (Chim Chimney & Cinderella) for 2 years representing my school, SKTL (happy to be with my friends)
• Performed Story Telling (Rasullullah and His Wives, The Nightingale & Pak Pandir) in school level and zone level (i enjoyed memorizing the story & 'poet'-ing - pantun, syair, sajak)

In 2001, I sat for UPSR examination. I got 5As and I had the opportunity to study in a boarding school in Batu Pahat, Johor, which is the MARA Junior Science College Batu Pahat. It was the first time I am away from my parents. The memories that I cannot forget during my lower secondary school

• Represented my college as a story teller for Minggu Bahasa/Language Week in MRSM Mersing (it was unexpected but unfortunately I lost due to lack of preparation and practice)
• Learned Silat (cannot remember the steps well now)
• Performed a musical drama (Nirmala) as a princess together with all the girls in my batch (i love to move with melody)
• Became a member of Pandu Puteri (i really love to)
• Became the vice president of English Club (but I was not fluent in speaking English and not confident at all)
• Had a great study group for PMR (Hazim, Aimi, Atikah, Farid and one more friend - they helped me a lot and I owed them)
• Became a classmate to Syuja'uddin b. Ismail, the son of the actor, Ismail Din for 3 years. (this is not that important)
• Suffered from Dengue Fever (it was very painful, I was very weak)

In 2004, I got 8As in my PMR examination. I was planning to study in MRSM Bitara maybe in Jasin, Melaka but unfortunately, I was not that excellent and I had to continue my journey in Batu Pahat. I learned many things throughout the 5 years living far away from home. There were good times and bad times but I treasured them all. I had many nice friends and teachers who are willing to help me and support me during all those times. It was so great experience.

• Went for a camping of Pandu Puteri & Renjer Puteri in MRSM Muar (I took quite a long time to wash the chicken to be cooked -no experience in cooking before)
• Went for a camping and jungle-tracking at Endau-Rompin with my homeroommates (we cooked and played well -oh, I almost fall into the jungle and lost!)
• Celebrated Hari Raya in Batu Pahat with Johor style - 'marhaban' from a house to another house (my teachers' houses)
• Celebrated Maulidur Rasul (selawat around the college)
• Affected with a strange skin problem due to exposure to sunlight when selling food on a Graduation Day (luckily it was nothing serious and recovered after some time)
• Experienced cross-country run in 'Ladang Kelapa Sawit' (sometimes, the track was slippery)
• Again, infected with Dengue (it was seriously emotional)
• Became a secretary for Food Bureau (food and me is related)

After school (2007), I was chosen to join Program Latihan Khidmat Negara (PLKN). I was proud to be there and it was another great experience. There were a lot of new things that I learned about life. I made many new friends from different races - Malay, Chinese, Indian and Orang Asli. (Before that, I only had Malay friends)

After that, I had my first working experience. I worked at a stationery shop in my residential area, Temerloh Jaya. My employer was a Chinese and I worked with an Indian. We were different races with different religions, different ages. However, we can respect each other. My employer really understands that Muslim is obliged to pray 5 times a day. He let me go to pray when it's time to pray. I worked from 9 a.m to 7 p.m everyday except Sunday. On Sunday, I had to work at night until the shop closes. I only had one day off which was Tuesday, I think. Basically my job was to do photocopy, to serve the customers, to make sure the shop was clean, to 'top up' the stocks, to put the price tag, to report to the boss if there is anything out of the stock. Sometimes, my boss also talked about life, future, business, skills that I needed in order to be successful. Even though sometimes he is quite mean but he is also kind to me. Maybe because he trusted me? He shared with me that he had many problems with his workers before me, but I'm not like anyone before. That was his compliment about me. Of course, I'm happy to hear that. How much I get for working with him for about 3 months? It's only about RM800 but enough for me as my pocket money when I further my study in the university. 

To shorten the story, I was admitted into International Islamic University Malaysia (IIUM). Actually, it was my 7th choice out of 8 in my UPU application. It was not science-based course at first. I went into the Taaruf Week in The Center of Foundation Studies, IIUM in Petaling Jaya as an economic student. Then, I applied to change course to Biological Science and the application was accepted. Alhamdulilah. So, I was studying what I studied before - Biology, Chemistry, Physics & Mathematics. I had the basics and I scored quite well in my foundation studies. After less than 2 years, I finished my study at the CFS with a satisfying CGPA. Alhamdulilah.

In 2009, I started my Degree studies in Biomedical Science at IIUM Kuantan Campus. There were also many exciting experience and events that change my worldview and my perspective of life, but maybe I share about that in details next time.

Actually, Abah said to me yesterday that,

"We only live for 3 days in this world. Yesterday ~ Today ~ Tomorrow".

Yesterday is our past and it has become our history. We cannot change it but we can learn something from the past. Today is our present, we should make sure that it is better than yesterday and do some preparation for tomorrow. Tomorrow is a secret. We don't know what will happen but we always have hope and dreams. I think, with that hope and dreams with prayers to Allah and our own effort, insyaAllah tomorrow would be the best day for us. =) 

~Work as if we were living forever but pray as if we were dying tomorrow~